Don't be a bore

A lot of people are boring, and don't know it. It's a bit like having BO -- no one tells you, but they quickly move away! I want to tell them, but I know I would only hurt or offend them, so I hope they will read this and take remedial action.

I have come across some really nice people who lose out because they do some of the things that mark them out as boring. So their good intentions or talents do not get noticed. It's worth being on the alert to the signs of waning interest on the part of those we meet.

I used to be guilty of capping stories. I thought I was merely extending the topic by adding my own experience, but others received it as capping stories. It took a female friend with the cojones to tell me about it. So let me help you to understand why you may not be making quite the impact you expect, when you attend networking meetings.

No offence is meant. On the contrary, if you recognise any of the symptoms, I hope you will make the necessary adjustments and become a person that others will want to talk to.

A bore is someone who:

•makes pronouncements on every subject that arises

•caps stories

•goes one better than everyone else

•talks too long

•is in love with the sound of their own voice

•pins you against the wall at parties or networking gatherings

•monopolises the conversation or another person

Above all, a bore is someone who seems not to be interested in what someone else says. Typically they will either interrupt before the other person has finished, or will ignore what has just been said and proceed with their own stuff.

The way to avoid being boring is always to be interested in what the other person is saying, and to make your own point sparingly. You can always elaborate if you are asked to do so, but never impose the elaboration on your listener. And beware of getting carried away if you are talking to a good listener who encourages to go on!

Try to be a good listener. It will help others to warm to you, and then they will want to know more about you. In business, remember that boring doesn't sell!

If you'd like help with becoming more interesting, email me: phillip@pkpcommunicators.com